7 WEEKS?!?! How has it been that long?!?
Sometimes it feels like in been an eternity and other times it feels like he was just here yesterday. I’ve been getting about one letter a week and man, are those the best days. I live to see a letter with his handwriting waiting in the mail box when I get home. He’s doing well. Has passed all tests so far, which I am so thankful for. Overall he sounds motivated and determined. As far as I go, Im doing better. Getting use to the house at night thank goodness. The first month was extremely hard in every way imaginable. Things got better the last 3 weeks because letters began to flow back and forth, I got a system for paying bills, we got his first pay check, I bought plane tickets to his graduation. But this last week was rough. I’ve been so emotional. Anything and everything makes me cry. Whether its a cute pet video on youtube or a character on one of my favorite tv shows dying. I cry! And I have never been the type of person to cry about these kind of things. Ive also cried a few times this week just from missing him. That use to happen every now and then during the first few weeks but it hasn’t for almost a month until recently. Im not quite sure what it is or what changed but Im just so ready for his graduation to be here.
Everyone keeps saying “You’re almost there” which I know they are trying to be encouraging and supportive. They mean well by it. Yes he is almost to graduation but thats one day. I get to see him for 8 whole hours before he is shipped off to AIT. Then AIT is another 4 months. And a good amount of that time, we won’t have his phone or visitation privileges so I appreciate you for trying but we’re not almost done. We’ve barely begun. I still have 5 months at least before my husband and I are under the same roof again. Thats a hard pill to swallow. I try not to think about it too much but at the same time, i have to keep reminding myself about it because its so easy to think BCT graduation is the finish line. But no no no. When they say that, I just smile and tell them that they are right. I don’t ever explain it to them because they won’t get it. Or it will make them feel sad for me and thats not what I want or need. Im ready to move to our FDS so I can be around other military spouses who understand this life and can relate. Im ready to be part of a community and family because right now its just me and my thoughts and that gets lonely.
Well Ill focus on the positive, 25 more days.
Please go fast.