Can You Not?!

On By This Beautiful LifeIn army, long distance, love, marriage, Military, relationships

As tough as this deployment has been, its been interesting discovering what my “Stages of Deployment” are. First it was shock followed by “how the heck am I going to do this”. Then the “whoo look at me!” followed my the “Oh no, please don’t break” haha. The halfway point brought a lot of encouragement but also made me say “What, what? We’ve been apart how long?!”. Now I am in the “Can you not?!” stage. This stage is different from all the others because all the rest were about me, but this one is about other people. Like to the couple in line in front of me at the grocery store, can you not hold hands and be all lovey dovey?! Can the couple at the gym not stop flirting for a second?! Can the couple on tv not make out?! Can my friend not tell me a detailed account of the super duper cute thing her husband did for her today?!

I’m so over love and PDA right now. It all just feels so obnoxious and in my face which is so dumb, I know it is! I can feel myself being ridiculous but its hard to help. I know where this is stemming from though… I MISS HIM! I miss having his hand to hold and goofing off with him in the store. I miss hearing his keys in the door when he comes home in the evening and I miss the sound of his voice. I miss movie marathons and spontaneous date nights. I miss late night snuggles and forehead kisses. I miss it all! And I am ready to have it back. I am ready to have him back.

As much as it hurts I am grateful to have a love that makes being apart so tough. Someone I’d rather wait for than have anyone else. I am so ready to be under the same roof, in the same time zone and on the same continent as my husband but I know he will be back soon enough and we’ll get our turn to enjoy all those simple joys. Just have to keep on keeping on. And not be envious of those that get to enjoy time with their loved one because it is such a precious thing that should not be taken for granted.

38 thoughts on “Can You Not?!”

  1. It is so awesome that you love and adore your husband so much. I chuckled as I read your list of Can you nots. When we miss someone we do react to situations differently and most likely you are noticing all the couples because your husband is away. You will be those couples as soon as he is back and you will be one of those that someone else watches and says ‘Can you not….’

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    1. I am so glad that you received this post in the lighthearted manner way I intended. I catch myself laughing at me too. That definitely is the reason I am so hypersensitive to other couples right now. Thank you for the encouragement and reassurance. I really am looking forward to those days. Cant come soon enough!!!

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  4. Thanks for stopping by and liking my blog post. I was drawn to your blog after noticing the military theme. Our son is shipping off to his first duty station with the Navy in Guam for 3 years this week. As parents, this is tough. But we can’t even imagine the difficulty as a spouse. Thank you BOTH for your service, surround yourself with healthy community, and God Bless! Love your blog 🙂

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    1. Oh wow, I can only imagine how it must be for you the send your son off to somewhere so far away. Please thank him for his service for me and thank you for raising such a wonderful, selfless, courageous child. Yes, it definitely is tough! But I just try to take it day by day and know he will be home soon. Thank you for your find words and encouragement. Both are much needed 😊

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  7. Oh I’m happy you got that out ,Now keep moving forward take a run, read turn up your favorite music in your house and sing at the top of your lungs hahaha who cares if someone here’s and yes most of of keep in mind he will be home soon ❤️

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    1. Thats well said. I most definitely do need him back! Still have quite awhile until he’s back but at least we’re closer to his homecoming than we were yesterday. I really appreciate your words and support. Thank you so much!

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  12. It’s tough being apart from the one you love for extended periods of time. My wife and I have be married for almost thirty years! I have to work two jobs, leaving home all day without me. She gets lonely, the time we have together is precious; she’s my heart! I pray that you and your husband will be reunited soon. Hold him close; within your heart!

    Look at it like this. Can You Please; never let me forget, how much I love him so!!

    Be blessed!

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    1. Thank you so much for reaching out and being able to relate. It always helped knowing others understand and have experienced it. I just need to keep taking it day by day and look forward to his homecoming. Thank you for the advice and encouragement.I need as much of that as I can get! Blessings to you and your wife!

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  13. I commend your attraction and devotion, as your love actually strengthens us all.
    My mate passed in 2009, and I am just now getting past the ‘can you not’s’.
    For almost 5 years I cried when I saw the gleam and love in others’ eyes. They called it an anxiety issue and therapy was the only solution. I call it love, and I’m glad you have it.

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    1. Thank you so much for reaching out to me and sharing your story with me. I am so sorry for your loss. I can only imagine what that is like. I most certainly agree with you that its not anxiety but true, unfading, undying, forever love. Thank you again for sharing that.

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  15. The Simple Girl

    My husband and I did a year long distance while we were dating, and as much as it sucked at the time, it made us really appreciate the time we have together. Even now, 7 years after long distance, we still appreciate having each other close because we know how terrible it was to be apart. Keeping a light heart and being able to laugh at yourself is the best way to deal with it in the meantime, I think!

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    1. That is so beautiful and encouraging. Thank you so much for sharing your experience with me. Definitely what I needed to hear. That great advice as well. I definitely have found that to be true. Sometimes thats all you can do! Thanks again!

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  16. PDA is the worst when you are missing your loved one! But the beauty of being apart is you never take each other for granted, and never sweat the small stuff. You look forward to seeing them and get those butterflies that a lot of couples have long forgotten. Stay strong in your LDR hope you see him soon!

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    1. This is so true. I could not have said it any bette. Thank you for the reminder. It was much needed. Being long distance truly does make you treasure and cherish every minute you get with your loved one. Thank you for the encouragement as well! Definitely counting down to his homecoming.

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  18. I’m sorry you had to write this, it is hard to realise what loneliness can really feel like; and the ‘actual’ things that we miss most such as, the absence of physical touch, sharing a moment, holding hands and real intimacy.

    I feel for you, and hope your loved is returned home soon, I am still looking find my someone! Sx 🙂

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    1. Thank you so much for reading!!! Wow, you understood exactly what I was trying to express in the post. We still have a few more months but I just take it day by day and know hell be home soon. Wishing you the best. You’ll find someone ❤️

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