Small Little Details

My Husband called a few weeks ago as I was taking a nap. When deployed, phone calls are like golds so I gladly woke up from when I saw it was him. We talked for a bit and I could feel something was a bit off but could not figure out what so I just kept talking. I even asked if he was okay and he said yes but it just did not feel like it. A few minutes later, he asked me how my day had been and so I told him all about work and the gym. Then I told him I had just woken up from a nap. When I said the last part, I heard him give a huge exhale of relief and he explained “That what it was!!!”. “Thats what what was?” I asked. “Your voice!!!” he said. He then got really quite and said “I forgot…” “You forgot what?” I asked. “Your sleepy voice” he said. When he said that, I felt both of our hearts break a little.

I knew exactly what he was feeling. Just a few days earlier, I had stood in the cereal aisle at the grocery store nearly in tears because I could not remember his favorite cereal. It had been over a year since I had to buy it. It shook us both. We both were silent and I felt us both questioning if we even knew the other any more. I knew we both were thinking what terrible spouses we were and how we had failed each other. But I also knew that wasn’t true and so I said the only three words I could. “I love you”. When he said it back, we both felt a calm come over us and we just started laughing. We knew we had to give ourself grace. It was not that we don’t try or pay attention to each other because we do. But after 13 months a part, of course some of the details have gotten fuzzy. Over the past year, we have gone days, weeks and even months without being able to talk. But what remained was our love and devotion to each other. And his love for me has nothing to do with if I know his favorite cereal or not. What matters is that despite the time and distance that we keep trying.

It meant everything to me that even though he may not have remembered my sleepy voice, he paid such close attention to me. That he cared enough to figure out the inflection in my voice and that he knew me well enough to know something was different. Now every time he calls and I’ve been napping he says something like “Oh I can tell you’ve been napping” and he says it with such pride. It truly is the sweetest things. Makes my heart melt every time.

Now if we have questions or have forgotten something about the other, we just ask! At the same time though, it made us both realize we will have to re learn parts of each other when we are back together. But its something look forward to and cant wait for.

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50 thoughts on “Small Little Details

  1. What a wonderful post. You capture the intimacy of your relationship, the challenge of reconnecting over ordinary things after time apart, frustrations inherent in any relationship, and your genuine love, caring and respect for each other.

    Very touched by this. Thank you.

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  2. Wow. I couldn’t imagine going through what you are! I had to go 2 months without seeing my husband when he spent the summer in South Korea and it was so difficult. I know you’re probably rolling your eyes at that comment and would gladly have taken just two months apart. Hang in there! You’ll see him soon!

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    1. No no, not at all! Actually I am so glad that you could relate!!! Whether 2 months or 15 months, the longing and missing them is the same. That I have learned for sure. Thank you for the encouragement and for reaching out!!!

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  3. “But what remained was our love and devotion to each other. And his love for me has nothing to do with if I know his favorite cereal or not. What matters is that despite the time and distance that we keep trying.” I love these lines!

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  4. How sweet. Thank you for sharing with such candidness and grace. Your post reminds me of the special moments we have in our marriage. I could not imagine being a part as you guys are, and you will be in my prayers. Thanks for liking one of my posts; so, I could find follow yours. Your story is both heart wrenching and inspiring. I pray the Lord will keep you both safe till you see each other again, and I pray when you do, the “rediscovery of one another” is amazing! 😉💕

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    1. Yes! Those little moments are so extremely special. I really appreciate the encouragement. Its not always easy but I love doing life and this journey with my husband. It means so much that you find it inspiring. Thank you for your prayers! Just a few more months and hell be home. Ill be sure to post updates 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Such a beautiful post. A reminder for us all how it is not only the troops who make the sacrifice, but also their families. Thank you for sharing your feelings so honestly. May you both find comfort in the love that you share across the miles.

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